my insomnia has kicked into high gear, and so i have been thinking crazy sleep deprived thoughts about tears and and that old cliché about it taking rain to make anything grow. You see, i have this block. i have a really really hard time crying. i feel that tight feeling in my chest, i want to cry, my eyes sting, and my throat clenches. But, nothing. i cannot cry. Its terrible… i never get that relief. my cheeks remain dry and all that emotional thorniness stays locked in my body. i think of all the types of tears i used to cry. We’ll dismiss most of them, and only think of the ones i cried for S. Tears of rejection, relief, pain, joy, fear, loneliness, inadequacy, compassion, longing, and exhaustion traced their way down my cheeks in respect to S. But, now… there is no moisture. No salty substance that witnesses the breadth of my feelings. Does this mean our relationship is doomed to wither?

Go forth and buy new album:


About Mae East

Brooklyn NYC and vicinity.
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