I’ve decided not to force myself to forget or down play what I still feel for you. Because I know I can’t. It would take forever. I will find a way to mend myself but it’ll take a while. A long while.

I thought when it was finally over that I simply move on. Or I was expecting myself to at least feel better or relieved about this. For I really tried. Everyone who has eyes can see that.  You deserved better. I know he treated you far better.

It seems that it’s harder than I thought.  This week 5 different dreams related to you. Five. I’m not joking. I can literally remember every one of them. And every one of them is about you trying to get rid of me. I woke up in tears at 11am, totally unable to believe myself. If only I could fix this.

I hardly have any energy left.

I’m really broken.

I can not hide from your memory or avoid it. In fact I still very much want to see you. Just see you. Nothing else.

I only want you.

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2 Responses to

  1. Surge says:

    You will find someone else.. and even if you don’t anytime soon, you will get over her. (or him.)

    Just saying. I’ve been there 😉 Go out, do things, keep your mind busy

  2. megorah says:

    Sends you a great big hug…its hard to walk away…i am in the midst of the same thing, but have found that…trying to take what was good in the past and live forward with that is the most helpful…don’t drag around the bad things…just carry on the good 🙂

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